I just want to take this moment to reflect. Honestly, the past few weeks were a bit overcast and it’s something that I don’t really know how to put into words… but I’ll try my best.
I’ve been sick for sometime and I cannot describe how painful this feels. I will not expound it anymore because I still have mixed feelings about it so hope you guys understand. I just need prayers at this point. I’m aware that there will be seasons of testing and I’m experiencing one at the moment. And it’s not a bad thing.
It’s easy to praise and worship God when everything’s in perfect shape but it’s even more important to glorify His name during difficult times, especially when your hope level is way down the drain. I don’t think it’s quite that easy for some… as for me, my ego hurt more than anything during this physical oppression. I always find myself falling on my knees, lifting all my disappointments and fears. Hey, even tough girls need some soothing too. But really, I have nothing to complain about. I believe that if you keep complaining then definitely you’re not ready to experience God’s mercy.
Yes, difficult challenges brought tears to my eyes but I just couldn’t lament that long because my heart knew that immeasurable joy could also be found in adversities and because of this, I’m not letting up. Besides, suffering is redemptive. If I have to undergo this painful process then so be it! I am not afraid to suffer for His cause. I am offering this excruciating feeling for the conversion of souls. The more I stare at my imperfect physical state, the more I appreciate the ultimate sacrifice of Jesus on the cross. Thank you Lord for reminding me to look past my wounds, for they’re nothing compared to Yours.
God’s love for me is so deep and I cannot argue with that. These scars are reminder of how awesome You really are Lord! I’m pretty glad that it did happened to me. I had the good fortune of recognizing how you’re working in my life simply by keeping my eyes open. Thank you for providing me with an experience, it gave me some time to rethink my life choices too. This particular circumstance led me to my ultimate goal – to be more closer to You.
I may have lost a bit of fire but my heart would be uneasy doing anything else… so, I gotta keep going! I just want to get over this sickness and do more mission work. 🙂
Hope this short sharing will resonate with some of you. Sorry, I have no more words. I thank the Lord for giving me the grace to write this blog entry. May we all be a testament of God’s goodness and mercy. Please include me in your prayers.
His love heals everything,